In the modern world, nothing rankles a self-proclaimed "excellent" writer like a know-it-all linguist who picks apart their preposterous punctuation with impunity. However, punctuation does not exist for formatting's sake alone-- it is the rhythm, the cadence, and the "audio" presentation of our work. Furthermore, punctuation is the chemistry of your language; without it, you may lose your reader's interest or, worse, lose their understanding entirely.

Case in Point: A famous telegraph.

-- What was intended: John, not getting any better, come home soon.

-- What was sent: John, not getting any, better come home soon.

Eh? Eh? Pretty important, yes? Imagine reading this poem without _intricately_ crafted punctuation:

Being in Love

with someone who is not in love with
you, you understand my predicament.
Being in love with you, who are not
in love with me, you understand my dilemma.
Being in love with your being in love
with me, which you are not, you understand

the difficulty. Being in love with your
being, you can well imagine how hard it is.
Being in love with your being you,
no matter you are not your being being in
love with me, you can appreciate and pity
being in love with you. Being in love

with someone who is not in love, you know
all about being in love when being in love
is being in love with someone who is not
in love being with you, which is
being in love, which you know only too well,
Love, being in love with being in love.

~ Marvin Bell

 

That being said, let's take a look at this wacky family of literary pauses:

Feel the Rhythmic Beat of Grammar, Mon!
The Comma	The shortest, softest pause around. Also the most common internal punctuation mark. Its softness makes it a unique and very useful mark. However, commas follow fairly strict rules of grammar-- it's not possible to just toss one in wherever you'd like a pause to be included.
Em Dashes	Multifaceted, dramatic, and powerful. Never necessary, but easily the most unappreciated punctuation around. In fact, it's so unappreciated that there's not even a key for it on a standard keyboard. To make your own dash, simply type two hyphens like so: -- . Many programs, such as OpenOffice and Microsoft Word, will transform the hyphens into a dash automatically.
Ellipses	The ellipsis is best used to communicate a long, trailing-away pause. Much less dramatic than the dash, and potentially longer in length, it can communicate someone becoming lost in thought, being distracted, or fading in and out of comprehensive speech. It can also be used when preceding a soft theatrical transition, in the same way that a movie would do a fade in/out. This is not a tension-building tool so much as a transitory or thoughtful one. Example: You seem very... calm. Composed, even. In this example, you can feel the speaker's mind trailing off for a moment while searching for the best word.
Colons	Common in appearance and narrow in use, it's worth a mention, although its usage demands the entire sentence being structured around it. A colon is like a promise-- what was spoken of before is about to come, so you'd better get ready!
Semicolons	Commonly used, this poor, misunderstood piece of grammar is thrown around like crazy and should be used very sparingly. One safe general rule for rhythmic use of a semicolon: If a period can go there, so can a semicolon. It indicates a harder pause than a comma but a softer pause than a period. When used between two complete thoughts, it suggests that one thought leads to another. Example: We regret that we are now officially out of firewood; however, if you'd like to burn the house of the next-door neighbor who stole half of our firewood last week, please be my guest.
Parentheses	Awkward and gangly, these little buggers are best used when looking for a deliberate, staggering break. Care must be taken when using these marks, however. When using them, you're essentially packing one idea into another, and if not done carefully, the sentence can easily become inappropriately long and confusing. Example of Misused Parentheses: When Martin saw his dog running towards him with the chewed-up rake (which he'd borrowed just last week from his neighbor Barry, who is always very reluctant to lend out his personal belongings), he chased him around for a half hour in anger and frustration. Example of Proper Usage of Parentheses: French drain (also known as "drain tile") is commonly installed along the exterior perimeter of a house.
Periods	Too common for this crowd? Usually, yes. However, the period can be creatively used for a powerful effect. A period, used appropriately, can create a hard stop in a thought that can snap a reader to attention and cause them to give greater pause to what they're reading. Example: Consider this quote from an Episode of Justice League entitled "Dark Heart." The context of this quote is that Batman's jet has been destroyed and his parachute has been ripped to shreds. He's free falling in the sky, with nothing nearby, and he's radioing to his superhero friends for help. Batman to all points. I could use some air support. Because I can't fly. At all. Now would be good. Help is not something Batman asks for easily. By adding in the periods for dramatic effect, it becomes clear that this is very awkwardly spoken. Without the periods, the reader would naturally believe that this sentence was spoken in a rush, possibly frantically. With the periods, the effect is more akin to... embarrassed?
Paragraph Breaks	Like the period, most people use this appropriately, but their creative potential is rarely tapped.  A paragraph break is the hardest, most disrupting break of all, and when employed properly, it's a powerful tool.
Apostrophes	This is going to step on some toes: I suggest using contractions in creative writing whenever possible, unless you're intentionally trying to drag out the language or are going for a formal tone. Apostrophes do wonders for streamlining the flow of a piece while doing nothing to take away from the meaning of the language. They make language richer, denser, and harder-hitting.

Real-Life Applications

Let's see how what we can do to work on some former community writing. I'll make changes based only on what we're discussing. Other editorial comments will be overlooked for now.

Case 1: Katden's "Ranch" Entry (Used with Permission) 

Original:

Normally she would fidget or babble when she was nervous. Of course it had been three long months since they had been in such close proximity. Lots could change in three months, apparently even lifelong mannerisms. He had the urge to reach across the seat and shake her, pinch her; something had to be done to free her from that cold blank mask she had donned.

She didn't chance a look at him. She couldn't without crying; so she would not allow herself to turn. Instead she focused on the passing scenery. He usually drove fast when he was upset. The car was winding along the country road at a leisurely pace.

Rewritten:

Normally, (1) she would fidget or babble when she was nervous. Of course, (1) it had been three long months since they'd (2) been in such close proximity. Lots could change in three months-- (3) apparently even lifelong mannerisms. He had the urge to reach across the seat and shake her, pinch her-- (3) something had to be done to free her from that cold, blank mask she had donned.

She didn't chance a look at him. She couldn't without crying. She (4) wouldn't (2) allow herself to turn. Instead, she focused on the passing scenery. He usually drove fast when he was upset; the (5) car was winding along the country road at a leisurely pace.

Explanation:

1. Introductory Phrases: I've included commas after introductory phrases. These are phrases that "set the stage," or conditions, for the remainder of the sentence. You don't need to use a pause after EVERY introductory phrase, particularly if it's a very short one or the sentence is very brief. In the case of "normally," I added a comma as a matter of preference. In the case of "Of course," adding a comma is still a matter of preference, but it does make the sentence more palatable, freeing up some of the reader's comprehension for other things.

Consider this:

Of course I'm coming with you if you're going to that wild party all night long!

Of course, I'm coming with you if you're going to that wild party all night long!

In the first sentence, the tone could easily be fun and lighthearted. A reader might see that as "Silly bean! Of course I'm coming!" In the second, it's easy to read a suspicious tone to the read. Think "Oh, you can go to that wild party if you want. Of course, I'm coming along to keep an eye on you!" Same sentence, one comma difference.

2. Apostrophe Usage: Notice that I went against my own rule and didn't contract several words in this piece. I did this deliberately. These paragraphs were taken from the beginning of the piece Katden shared. I think it's a good idea to deliberately slow down your rhythm at the beginning of a piece, and as such, I only abbreviated in the first paragraph when the tone was in danger of feeling stilted. In the second paragraph, notice that nearly every possible contraction is already used-- I contracted the remaining word for consistency of tone.

3. Dash Usage: In "-- apparently" the comma was replaced with a dash for increased dramatic effect. This is clearly a key point in the story-- she's going to want the reader to make a harder, longer pause than a comma can provide. In the case of "-- something," the semicolon has a sterile, formal feel to it, as semicolons tend to have. This is an emotional moment in the piece; semicolons are more often used for explication. To add a charge to the sentence, I feel a dash is more in order.

4. Creative Period Use: A semicolon can only be used where a period could be used. While in modern language it's technically no longer incorrect to start a sentence with a conjunction ("so" is a conjunction), it's generally frowned upon. Conjunctions can only start a sentence when you want to create an more abrupt, hard break than a period alone can offer. It's counterproductive to use a conjunction to hardness, only to then soften it by replacing the period with a semicolon.

5. Using a Semicolon to Help Comprehension and Rhythm: Here, the information about the driver speeding up when he was upset and his current driving habits go hand in hand. Neither sentence would stand alone in this piece with its implicit meaning without the other. This is a perfect situation where a semicolon helps guide the reader to more easily understand the close relationship between these two sentences while improving what is otherwise two choppy sentences. Unlike the comma usage before, this semicolon _is_ being used to aid in explication.

Case 2: Asianprincess61's First Fiction (Used with Permission)

Original:

He stepped out into the hall and began meandering through the chateau. Endless halls were lined with bedrooms, sitting rooms, libraries, music rooms, and drawing rooms, all decked in Victorian decadence. The clock began to chime again. Bong... Silence. In the darkness of the hallways, his mind began to wander back to a different time, to a different place, where halls were eerily alive with the other members of their coven. In his ears, he could hear all the voices of his family. Now... they're all gone. Spread out like petals in the midnight wind, he thought, trying to amuse himself with poetic thinking. A wry smile spread on his face. Though only wearing his ruffled shirt, his burgundy vest, and his trousers, he could not feel the chilled air in the chateau. The chateau was silent. Though, a few rats scuttled about in the kitchen.

Wandering into the ballroom, he leaned on the doorway and looked out into the wide, empty expanse of the oak floor and the high white walls, with his glowing eyes. He could almost hear the room's desperate lonely cry. Where are those lovely bygone days? The walls seemed to ask.

Rewritten:

He stepped out into the hall, (1) meandering through the chateau. Endless halls were lined with bedrooms, sitting rooms, libraries, music rooms, and drawing rooms-- (2) all decked in Victorian decadence. The clock began to chime again. Bong... Silence.

(3) In the darkness of the hallways, his mind began to wander back to a different time, to a different place, where halls were eerily alive with the other members of their coven. In his ears, he could hear all the voices of his family. Now... they're all gone. Spread out like petals in the midnight wind, he thought, trying to amuse himself with poetic thinking. A wry smile spread on his face. Though only wearing his ruffled shirt, his burgundy vest, and his trousers, he could not feel the chilled air in the chateau. The chateau was silent, (4) though (5) a few rats scuttled about in the kitchen.

Wandering into the ballroom, he leaned on the doorway and looked out into the wide, empty expanse of the oak floor and the high white walls (5) with his glowing eyes. He could almost hear the room's desperate, (6) lonely cry. Where are those lovely bygone days? The walls seemed to ask.

Explanation:

1. Commas for Conciseness: Sometimes the biggest bang is in what's implied. In this case, a simple comma does the work of "and began" simply by existing. I said before that you can't just go tossing around commas willy nilly, but with a little restructuring, you can make a comma happen almost anywhere. Often effectively.

2. Dashes for Clarity: In this case, we have an ordered list separated by commas, followed by an aside. Since the aside also needs to be separated by commas, this makes for a slightly confusing format. Luckily, the dash exists-- a beautiful piece of punctuation that exists solely to replace and upgrade already-existing punctuation. Either a dash or semicolon is needed here to make this grammatically correct (semicolons replace commas in situations like this), but because of the dramatic nature of the prose here, I'd opt for the dash.

3. The Dramatic Paragraph Break: Ah. Yes. See it? We have a BONG, followed by Silence, right before this moment. What better way to emphasize the silence than to cause the reader to pause momentarily as well? This can easily be accomplished by a dramatic paragraph break. Bong. Silence. The reader literally pauses.

4. Comma for flow's sake: While the comma here is also making the second sentence grammatically correct, note how both sentences flow much better without the long pause of that period. Furthermore, it's more in form with the piece-- this work is characterized by long, elegant sentences.

5. Unnecessary Commas: Never use a comma if it's not helping. In the case of "Though," it's not grammatically correct, and while it could be technically correct in the second usage, why use it? When editing, check over each comma and ask, "Is this helping anything?" If the answer is no, then ask, "Can I get rid of it?"

6. Multiple adjectives describing a noun: This is a rule more than a technique. When using multiple adjectives to describe a noun, separate each one with a comma. "Big, hairy, evil-looking spider."

Case 3: Balloonhat's TheBrenLJIdol Entry (Used with Permission)

Original:

In the morning, the soldiers carried extra on their backs, and for the first time both Mas'oudazi and Ilooq were given packs of their own to carry. It made walking harder for Ilooq, whose sense of balance was off without use of his arms, but it weighed so little that he barely noticed it at all. Mas'oudazi, however, was clearly uncomfortable; she kept reaching back to shift its weight. Eventually, when they paused for a short break, she re-did her pack so that it hung at her waist rather than on her back. Watching her, Ilooq caught himself wanting to offer to carry her burden; but he said nothing.

A snowstorm hit them hard after that, forcing them to make camp early to wait it out or risk losing each other in the snow. The storm raged around them for two days straight, and their food stores ran so low that Ilooq overheard one of the soldiers quietly tell Kristof that they should give "it" less food now that rationing was a concern. To fill his empty stomach Ilooq ate snow and sticks and bark from the spindly trees.

Stories of Yeti survival came to him at night like solemn animals. The Yeti were both ritualistic and practical cannibals, though legends of their bestial behavior were greatly exaggerated. Living in the harsh mountains, Yeti clans never let meat go to waste, even if that meat was off their relatives, kinsmen or enemies; especially their enemies. The Yeti believed that if they killed an enemy -- and clan disputes over precious claims on grazing land and animals were common -- and left him to rot, then they were cursed by their ghosts. The practice disgusted Ilooq's mother, and so Ilooq was raised to think it savage as well, but as the snow beat against him like little fists and he remembered the taste of fresh meat, Ilooq found himself looking at his toes and wondering if he needed them all. Realizing the morbid direction his thoughts had taken, Ilooq shuddered.

Rewritten:

In the morning, the soldiers carried extra on their backs. For (1) the first time, (2) both Mas'oudazi and Ilooq were given packs of their own to carry. It made walking harder for Ilooq, whose sense of balance was off without use of his arms, but it weighed so little that he barely noticed it at all. Mas'oudazi, however, was clearly uncomfortable; she kept reaching back to shift its weight. Eventually, when they paused for a short break, she re-did her pack so that it hung at her waist rather than on her back. Watching her, Ilooq caught himself wanting to offer to carry her burden, (3) but he said nothing.

A snowstorm hit them hard after that, forcing them to make camp early to wait it out or risk losing each other in the snow. The storm raged around them for two days straight, and their food stores ran low. (1) Ilooq overheard one of the soldiers quietly tell Kristof that they should give "it" less food now that rationing was a concern. To fill his empty stomach, (2) Ilooq ate snow, (4) sticks and bark from the spindly trees.

Stories of Yeti survival came to him at night like solemn animals. The Yeti were both ritualistic and practical cannibals, though legends of their bestial behavior were greatly exaggerated. Living in the harsh mountains, Yeti clans never let meat go to waste, even if that meat was off their relatives, kinsmen, (5) or enemies. (1) Especially their enemies. The Yeti believed that if they killed an enemy and left him to rot (6) -- and clan disputes over precious claims on grazing land and animals were common –, then they were cursed by their ghosts. The practice disgusted Ilooq's mother, and so Ilooq was raised to think it savage as well. (1) But as the snow beat against him like little fists and he remembered the taste of fresh meat, Ilooq found himself looking at his toes and wondering if he needed them all. Realizing the morbid direction his thoughts had taken, Ilooq shuddered.

Explanation:

1. Breaking up Sentences for Dramatic Effect: What we have in this piece is an excerpt from a story about survival in the wilderness-- I'm reminded of "Eaters of the Dead" by Michael Crichton as I read it. However, this sentence is a long, rambling one, almost as if the writer realizes that they have a lot of information to share all at once and are trying to rush through it. However, this is an excellent time to take your time. When you're sharing something grueling-- for instance, a story of survival-- it engages the reader best to adopt the voice of one who is empathizing with how long and grueling their experience is. Those who are fighting for survival begin to conserve their energy. In this case, I think that the better choice is to pick the shorter, briefer, more fundamental-feeling sentences as a default. The length of your sentences should change depending on what kind of story you're telling.

2. Introductory Phrases are Followed by a Comma: I said this before in the article, and I'll say it again. When a phrase, most commonly a prepositional phrase or an if/then statement, is "setting the stage," follow it with a comma.  "For the first time" and "To fill his empty stomach" are both introductory phrases. In the case where a comma and a conjunction are used to separate two independent clauses (think: complete sentence), treat the second clause with the same rules you'd apply to a new sentence. See source here.

3. Improper use of a Semicolon: A semicolon should only be used in places where a period could be used. In this case, you have a conjunction followed by an independent clause (think: complete sentence). To make this grammatically correct, it's necessary to use a comma here instead.

4. Repeated use of "And" in a List Form: If something is written in a dialectical form, almost anything goes, provided the rules of that newly invented dialectical form are adhered to. However, in this piece, I don't get a sense of a form of this manner. Therefore something like "snow and sticks and bark" is more distracting than charming, and you don't use the same form later with "relatives, kinsmen or enemies." Instead, separate "snow and sticks" with a comma.

5. Comma Usage in Ordered Lists: This is a matter of personal preference, but I feel very strongly about this one. In the case of a list such as "relatives, kinsmen or enemies," or a list that uses "and" instead of "or." I almost always separate the final two items in a list with a comma unless they're conceptually related. Check out the examples and do with it what you will.

Examples:

I see Dick, Jane, and Spot.

For condiments, we have mustard, mayonnaise, salad dressing, vinegar, salt and pepper.

Endangered species include the Northern White Rhinoceros, The Yangtze River Dolphin, the Giraffe, and the Snowy Owl.

For tomorrow's party, we've invited Sue, Barry, Hugh, Larry, Tiff and Tony (where Tiff and Tony are married).

6. Organizing Concepts Separated by Parenthetical Phrases: Readers read quickly, right? They also have very little in the way of short-term memory. When using parenthetical phrases, such as the one I'm using now, be careful to organize the information in the sentence very carefully. Parenthetical phrases can be distracting -- at least parenthetical phrases like this one -- and while they're necessary, must be treated mindfully. When you use them (and I'm sure you will), be sure to put all related information together and not split in half by the parenthetical phrase.

As you've figured out by now, parenthetical phrases can be separated by parentheses, dashes, or commas.

Check out how much easier this sentence is to understand:

Before: The Yeti believed that if they killed an enemy - and clan disputes over precious claims on grazing land and animals were common - and left him to rot, then they were cursed by their ghosts.

After: The Yeti believed that if they killed an enemy and left him to rot -- and clan disputes over precious claims on grazing land and animals were common –, then they were cursed by their ghosts.

Ultimately, both sentences are a bit long, and a rewrite of the entire sentence might prove the best method. However, note in the second paragraph that there's no suspended thread following the parenthetical phrase.

Conclusion

Remember:

• A woman, without her man, is nothing

• A woman: without her, man is nothing.
  

Punctuation is powerful! It's the heartbeat and cadence of your words. It makes what you write more palatable to the reader, and it creates your literary voice. Spend time on all your punctuation when editing-- be able to explain why you used each piece and why it's necessary.